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From the moment you said "It's time." my heart has been racing. I am here tonight as your sister and best friend, the woman who you leaned on and the woman to whom I often now turn. Tonight and into tomorrow, the contractions will come closer and closer together. Soon, you will be holding your daughter. You've called Jaime ( Read more... )

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I dreamed I died first ( Read more... )

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Today, I'm spending the day thinking about legacy. Mine, specifically. I have no children, and the name I live under might be real now, but on the same level it is false. Elizabeth Jackson came up out of nowhere and will fade back into nothingness. She has no high school moment where she won some horse jumping competition ( Read more... )

Date: _______________________*

Written Sunday Afternoon, Day 14

( Better today. )

Written in the Early Hours of Saturday Morning, Day 13

Date ________________________*

I'm searching for a scrap of paper on which to write a sentence only I will ever read.

( Written by TV light. )

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So lost right now ( Read more... )

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I can't tonight. It's too close. Too real. What I can't say to the world, why I'm pacing and tormented is that it's the anniversary. It's the day. It's the damned day when I felt those bullets enter my skin, tear my body apart ... it's the day I left it all behind and it's the night that I have to come to terms, actual ( Read more... )

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Yesterday was odd ... but not in a bad way. It was actually one of those things I had to tell my best friend about before I could even write it down ( Read more... )

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Are you happy now? You win ( Read more... )

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I don't want to be a mother. I have enough to do with the kids that come in and out of my life, playing with the horses, leaving footprints behind. They shape me; I am softer, more understanding, more lienent than I ever expected to be around children. I keep kleenexes with me to wipe tears and noses, give hugs like they ( Read more... )